Friday, December 28, 2007
~achieve the goal of getting as close as possible to my pre-pregnancy weight (yes, it is still not totally off, though I am rather close)
~create the final addition to our family
~run a half-marathon (obviously contradicting the previous desire, but not being overly-optimistic that I could do a full marathon...keeping the standards attainable)
~build a privacy fence
~finish some major parts of our house that haven't been touched since Syl arrived
~read more books (above the toddler reading level, that is)
~cut out the bad stuff to achieve goal #2
~get Syl into a big-girl bed
~take a trip to a location desired by both me and my hubbie
~elect an awesome president for the first time in almost a decade
~ride my bike more
~spend time on myself (haha)
~watch less t.v.
~make money doing something enjoyable and semi-stress free
~volunteer with Syl
There may be more added to this when I'm in a more positive mood. Syl barely napped this afternoon, despite a long and playful morning with other kids. This meant no break for mommy, and a crabby afternoon for all. On a happier note, my sewing machine came! I'm so thrilled, but have have no time to spend with it.
I hope all had an exciting holiday with only tiny bits of stress. I was very relieved when Wednesday came and I knew it was ALL over. But we had fun hanging out with the family and not overly-indulging Syl in crap made overseas. I haven't taken any pics lately, we did all video over xmas. But I did do a last minute gift for the family and have decided this should be a source of income because it the most awesome idea I've seen through in quite some time. Enjoy! Oh, and if you want me to do the same for your lovely child, I'm available!!!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
The day after my bday, I was recapping this story to all I saw. Syl was never near me, but always within an earshot, apparently. Now, those who know me well can attest for the fact that I tend to speak in an uninhibited manner (to be polite). But since Syl has been around and cognisant, I try hard to watch my tongue. When bad words slip through, they are spoken in a normal way and she has never been able to decipher the good from the bad. She repeated damn once after Dave said it in her face (kind of accidentally) after I loudly shut my car door. Ok, damn isn't too bad. When she was a but younger, she repeated shit one time. But she was so little that it was kind of funny and it quickly slipped from her memory. I try very hard to avoid the f-word because she talks so much, repeats everything, and now has a much longer memory. The f-word is to be saved for those special occasions and not thrown around lightly, at least for a 19 month old.
So after a full day of recapping my dramatic tale of my bday, Dave came home for dinner. As we were sitting at the table, Syl blurted it out: Fuck You! Clear as day. Now, the sailor mouth in me wanted to be proud. It is an embarrassingly hilarious reality check when your 19 month old child can't say the entire alphabet yet, tie her shoes, or boil water. But when that 2 syllable phrase so delicately rolls out of their mouth, WOW! Mother of the year, I think I deserve the award for "Yea right, JJ, like You can raise a proper little girl." Dave glared directly at me, as I tried not to react or roll out of my seat with laughter. She repeated it a few more times, until I finally looked at her, very seriously mind you, and told her that's not a nice thing to say (like she knows what nice means).
The subject got dropped, as the holidays have officially taken over our lives. Leading me up to tonight, when the phrase was dropped again. I stared directly into her eyes and calmly stated, "Sylvia, we don't say things like that. Please don't say that again."
Oh karma, you are such a dirty, dirty bitch.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Hahahaha. Naive in my theory, there was no truth in that thought. As my body has finally adjusted to no longer nursing, and no longer being pregnant, the ladies are sadly movin on. I know, t.m.i. for the average reader. But as stated before, this is my blog and I'll cry if I want to. They are almost sad, missing the fullness that milk provided. Craving to be filled, all I can do is watch them shrink. They almost look the same, with some bonus stretch marks that pregnancy and breastfeeding provided. But they don't feel the same. They are, dare I say it, empty. You may have already experienced this, you may be soon to find this out, you may never ever know what I am talking about. Say here is the blanket statement: breasts are for breastfeeding, post-breastfeeding breasts are for padded bras.
I have no money, and no desire for surgery. If I were to ever get surgery for something, it would be to permanently remove some extra baggage I carry on my thighs,belly,and ass. Regardless, I'm never going to go under the knife that some regular exercise could take care of. I'm just saying, boob jobs really gross me out. I'll just sit here, with my ladies of perpetual shrinkage, and relish in the fact that I never once paid for formula, bottles, or binkies.
Monday, December 17, 2007
In more chaotic news, this next week is going to chaotic. I know, I know, waaaa waaaa. It's that way for everyone. But this is my blog and I'll cry if I want to. Tomorrow is the playgroup xmas get together at Mobot's train show. Tomorrow nite is knitting group, which I may just skip to finish all the handmade gifts of this year. Wednesday (the big 3-0) is absolute mayhem. Heather wants to do breakfast, my favorite meal of the day. Kelly wants to do lunch of sushi, my all time favorite thing to eat. I have an acupuncture appt. at 3. I wanted to also get my hair cut, but may have to leave that one out. Then the in laws are coming over to spend time with Syl before she goes down for the nite, and we are going up to Urban to party! Thursday my cousin wants to do lunch, again, sushi was suggested. Friday is the absolute last day to finish all the homemades, there are a crapton (it's in the dictionary) because Saturday & Sunday, the family will be here. Luckily, Monday, xmas eve, is totally free and xmas is here at home. So after Sunday, it gets lighter. Good things are: I don't have to travel, almost everything I'm giving out is handmade, and I am alive in a nice house with the man I love and an amazing daughter. Ok, guilt has set in. I really don't have shit to complain about. I'm superficial and feel sorry for myself. But isn't that what the holidays are all about?
Friday, December 14, 2007
She's really not this much bigger than him, it was just perspective. But I like to call this one, "Big Girl, Small Boy"
The embrace was quick and blurry, but it was a moment we'll never let them forget.
This is what she'll write in her wedding journal... "When we first met, I couldn't stop talking about him...his eyes, our similarly wild hair, his delicate frame. I wanted to hold him in my arms, but alas! I was so young, so weak. Instead, I shoved loud, banging plastic toys in his face. When he would get bored with me, I would dance in a crazy fashion, taught only to me by my mother, who was battling daily with my delightful toddlerish idiosyncrasies. Maybe my mom was right, we were too young. But I knew, in my heart, that if I couldn't have him now, I would have him someday..."
On a less crazy tip, Heather's cousin, Emily, created some very adorable slings for small children to use. Well, Sylvia happens to adore her sling (did I mention Syl also believes she is 24 years old and that every baby out there is really HER baby?). Here are a few photos of her holding her "baby" tiger (all her baby dolls are too big for her to carry around). Thanks Emily!
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Wednesday, December 12, 2007
I got a phone call this morning from that photographer I interviewed with last month (finally). I will be assisting her 3 times in January, which is good financial news. That is a generally bleak month money wise, due to the impending taxes and all. It'll also help determine if assisting part-time is really what I want to do. It pays decent, and the hours are perfect for my family. We'll see...
So Butter and I have been discussing a plan to open a kid's store here in the south side. I got super excited about the idea today after talking with my old boss Mo. She is on board and believes our idea would be great for the area, so I called Butter to tell her I'm back on board. I had moments of doubt, which I'll probably have again. But for some reason, I needed a good swift kick in the ass to remind me to go ahead and take the chance. Talking about it isn't going to kill me, and maybe a really positive, life-changing thing will emerge from it. Let's face it, I really don't work well under authority, I like to be in charge, and I'm a control freak. That being stated to those who don't know me, being my own boss (co-boss) seems to be the best solution. I would love to design a location, make it an awesome place for parents and babies, and contribute to the good of this stinky city. So the wheels have begun to spin, hopefully they won't make me too dizzy, as my wheels tend to do.
On a crafting tip, I am the world's worst knitter. I think I need to abandon the needles and focus on other crafting ventures. Why is something, which should be meditative and relaxing, make me want to smash my head into bricks on a regular basis? Plus, it's giving me carpal tunnel (which I'm sure I'm spelling wrong).
P.S. (doesn't really pertain to a blog, but I'm silly like that). My big 3-0 is next Wednesday, and all are welcome to toast it up with me at Urban on Grand (the old Lemongrass) from 9 on. No gifts (not that you cheap bitches out there would bring me gifts, or vice versa for that), just you and your ability to drink copious amounts of yummy cocktails.
Monday, December 10, 2007
In knitting news, I finished my round hat, though I ended up squaring off the top for a quick finish. I dropped the last stitch due to my eyes closing from being so tired, so it made for a bumpy finish. But all in all, it's uber-cute. I sent it off to my nephew, since he has no winter hat yet, so I didn't get any photos. But it was cute. I used super small needles so the weave was so tight, it looked machine, stitched. Professional, eh? Plus, it took about half the time as my other hats. Who knew?
In womanly body news, I got my first post-d&c monthly visitor this weekend, if you know what I mean ladies. I wanted to start off with a slight warning, either to intrigue or to deter readers. I wasn't expecting it so soon, post-procedure, but it showed up like a lion, and is still roaring away. It's good news and depressing news simultaneously. It means I can get pregnant again, if I choose, after my next cycle. But it's an unfriendly reminder that I am not pregnant now. It's ok, I now realize that I wasn't emotionally ready. But it's such a Fuck You when your body has to decide your fate, not your mind. I want another baby, and I'll have one. But the bloody mess that is my period is mocking the choices I was making for my family. Damn empty uterus syndrome.
I told you with my warning, you kept on reading. Your fault!!
I can't tell if it's hormones, or this putrid weather (does that even make since??), but I am feeling rather surly and bitter. Anyone else?
Why do I keep asking questions to dead air? I'm going crazy...
Saturday, December 8, 2007
My next venture is the Indie Valentine Festival in February at Maplewood's Cooper Ella's Kids Boutique. I've been trying to get them to carry my slings anyway, so maybe this will help. I recently became a member of the St. Louis Craft Mafia, which is a highly organized group of crafting ladies. I have a link to their page, and will soon have several links to all the members pages. Looks like I have to sew, sew, sew! I thank Rachel for getting me hooked.
On a knitting note, I've been knitting in the round a baby hat for my nephew Alec. I think I'm getting carpal tunnel from the over-excitedness to finish it quickly, but it's turning out super cute. I think this is the way to go now. The weave is very tight and almost perfect looking. It's hard to drop/add stitches this way. I'll take a photo when it's complete. Now it just looks like a crazy round tube. I thank Heather Butter for this addiction. Oh, and she's to thank for the craft show frenzy. Love you Butter!
Thursday, December 6, 2007
We picked Ava and her carseat up this morning and headed over to the train show (yes, again. it's free for us, I can't resist). The girls coulda gave a damn about those amazing trains, and instead found joy in twirling about and laughing hysterically. It was pretty damn cute. Of couse, I decided to bring the video camera instead of the digital camera, due to it's small size. After recording about 3 minutes of the dance, the battery died. So much for being prepared for those special moments...
After lunch, Syl and I returned Ava to her home to join her family and new sis, baby Rosa. The girls had a blast, and it wasn't too much over the work I spend taking Syl somewhere alone. The most cumbersome bit is loading 2 kids into carseats, but that was it. They eat the same thing for lunch (except Syl ate about 3x as much as Ava). They play well together, and Ava is so polite. Bonus, the new parents got a well deserved nap.
In knitting news, I'm attempting to knit in the round, which I believe I may have messed up on already. But if I can be successful at it, my baby hats will take about half the time to make. I have no funny stories today, purely informative and a bit lackluster. Anybody else having a rather mellow Thursday?
I'll be getting my xmas cards soon to send out, so if I need your address, which I probably do, email it over to my sling address (firstname.lastname@example.org). Rachel, this goes for you too! I don't think I have your new one. Later peeps, stay warm!
Sunday, December 2, 2007
We then walked downstairs to the train show, which she didn't give 2 shits about. I don't know what it is that gets engrained at such a young age, but all (ALL) the little boys there were freaking out about the trains. Syl, and most little girls, were more interested in the animal details, or the copious amounts of poinsiettas everywhere. It was pretty funny. Here are some shots of her looking quite pensive, not giving a damn about the marvelous, and rather large, train exhibit.